How often do you feel like someone is talking about you behind your back? a) Rarely b) Occasionally c) Often d) Almost always

For official diagnostic criteria, healthcare professionals refer to the

You might be using a third-party library that promises to return an Integer. What happens when they push an update that accidentally returns a String? If you aren't checking types paraniodally, your application crashes.

The modern paranoid checker’s camera roll is a terrifying museum of domestic banality. Photos of a closed garage door. A video of a flickering pilot light. A zoomed-in shot of a sink with no water dripping. They review these photos not once, but ten times, zooming in to ensure the pixels look "off enough."

And if you just checked your pocket to see if your phone is actually there… welcome to the club. Let’s work on it.